15. The Self

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Q: Yesterday I was taking a walk on the beach sunk in myself and I sat on a rock where the waves break. Without thoughts in the mind I watched the movement of the waves when the consciousness of I disappeared. In a state of complete serenity and inner quiet I contemplated how a thought arose and this lasted and disappeared in me. I also contemplated emotions in the same way, but both thoughts and emotions arose and disappeared as if they were alien to me, even though I was aware that they came from within me. Tears fell from my eyes but my interior was impassive and lucid. Everything I contemplated from a point as more impersonal, as something objective that was external to me, although always aware that everything happened inside me.

The mind was without thoughts, as I said, but it was not absorbed in the consciousness because it also contemplated that my interior the outside, the waves breaking, the people that were there, etc., and my mind understood, I did not think but I understood. The inner state was of impassivity and Silence before tears or anything else. Inwardly it was filled with a Solitude and a total Silence together with absolute warmth.

Inside, everything came gently. On the outside everything looked at it in a dispassionate way but with tenderness at the same time. I felt completely free.

Parameshwar, could you explain what this state is? To what is owed or with what corresponds all this that I have explained? I do not doubt that the experience was real, but I'm a bit disoriented ...

P: Well, you watched the passage of thoughts, emotions, tears, inner impassivity and silence. This state of disidentification points to the Witness contemplating separately any impression that appeared and disappeared. If you had sunk in yourself you would have realized that there is no such Witness. In any case, you have come very close to Turya, where Lucidity is next to Existence, such is the Witness's clean Being. This degree of Unidentified Consciousness completely of everything can be called Self, Being, since the states are not absolute and with borders, the limits are blurred and are called "approximation" states.

Q: Yes, I was not absorbed in consciousness!

P: You missed that, to disidentify yourself from the Witness and see its nonexistence. In any case, it has happened, so you should reinforce your sadhana so that the possibility of it happening again is not lost. Above all, take note of your inner state at the time the state occurred. Many times we lose opportunities because we do not remember our inner state, experiences do not arrive like that, because they obey causes, they are results, effects of sadhana.

Q: I have had a good season with inner strength to perform my sadhana during my daily life, where I hardly lose consciousness of ME, but there are moments of strong identification in which I do lose it, moments of the day when my work demands me a lot of attention.

P: The practice must be intelligent. If you can not be present to yourself in those circumstances, reinforcing the easier moments ends with the difficult moments. Intelligent practice means not being overwhelmed with it, making it natural, not using willpower, but the firmness of purpose. You know that on the other side is that stillness and that peace that is not the first time you've tasted. Turya is full of you without you. Lucidity accompanies all states, is there, always there, and is the Lucid Silence and the stillness of Peace. The next time it happens, remember to sink yourself to release the consciousness of the observing eye.

You know what I want to say?

Q: Yes, to be without being, to abandon me! You really have to spin very thin. [He laughs.]

P: Yes, you have to spin very thin! So much so that many believe they have reached some kind of goal when they become conscious of ME! The line that separates Consciousness "I Am" from Pure Being or Existence without entity is so thin that it could practically be called Atman, but ...

The I Consciousness is the Pure Being with the perception of being an individual. The "I Am" realizes the same state of Silence that exists in Turya and knows that it IS and that it is there, but that same awareness must be extinguished with the abandonment and the sinking in itself. His state is like Turya, like Turya! But it is not yet. This has to be very clear, this is a state that occurs in Vigilia and Turya is jagrat-sushupti. The state of "I Am" is encompassed within the Savikalpa Samadhi, according to tradition and with Turya we are already talking about the Nirvikalpa Samadhi. In the Savikalpa Samadhis there is the Witness that disappears in the Nirvikalpa. This classification of samadhis must be known in order to situate our own experiences. It is important, they are given and they give us the pattern.

The states that are going through as one immerses oneself in the perception of being are pure and do not admit discussion or philosophy. The deep-awake Dream is as its definition describes, you can not philosophize about it, or you experience it or not, the state is unknown until you live it. The mind can not even imagine the state of being completely asleep and fully awake at the same time. It is a real state.

I-a .: How is the jump from the state of "I Am" to Turya? Is it necessary to consolidate "I Am" in everyday practice or is there a method to be followed?

P: The methods used here are extracted from natural processes. Yes, there is a practical way to jump from one state to another! But to be able to do it, the "I Am" must be properly consolidated. The transit between states occurs in a natural way, the technique only helps to accelerate the process. When you start to take the step things happen that do not go unnoticed, those alterations will be the technique.

One way to jump to Turya is, first, to learn to abandon oneself to the point of disappearing in the Silence of Pure Consciousness, and as an effect it happens that the conscious center that is located in the head / shoulders dissolves and the breath knocking on the The center of the chest situates, in a natural way, a new conscious center. Apparently there is a transfer in the body, a movement of Consciousness. The breathing becomes deeper and this causes the upper body to be released psychologically. Breathing, as it becomes slower, leads to abandonment in oneself until the loss of the sense of SELF. They are natural processes that are observed in practice. There comes a time when the body falls asleep completely and mental activity is almost nil while Consciousness remains alert. One enters deep-awake sleep and this occurs in an entirely natural way.

None of this can happen if the I is not very stabilized, and this means that the Consciousness is uninterrupted for hours. With the sinking of the Self Consciousness in itself, it dissolves and it is said that the Center of the Heart has been reached, the BEING IS or BEING without a Witness. This is already a change, a movement from the I to the BEING; the only thing that does not change is the state of alertness or lucidity, in addition, that change occurs in it.

If you are not aware that you are the SELF, no matter how much you apply your attention to the breathing in your chest, you will achieve nothing more than a state of tranquility, just as when you recite a mantra or a prayer. It is important that you understand this because without a doubt the impulse that is in all of you is to run and force the state. There is nothing more lacking in intelligence than this impulse born of the desire to "possess".

I-b: Can we live in the world in a state of BEING or simply have to keep ourselves in the state of "I Am"?

P: In both states. The Being is the Intelligence. The I is intelligent. You can live and, in reality, that is what you do with practice, to remain without thoughts during your daily life, in constant samadhi. Advaita points in that direction.

The act of realizing is not something of the intellectual mind, to walk you do not need to tell the feet to walk. To understand what they say you do not need to analyze the words, for that you use understanding. You just realize, you understand and you respond. All this is done mechanically while you do not lose sight of who you are. That mechanism has a lot to do with the philosophical issue of the "non-doer."

I-a: I have meditated for many years and I have always fixed my attention on breathing or on a mantra, is that correct?

P: Of course it is correct! Why the question?

I-a: I say it in the sense that if these methods lead to a recognition of the Self.

P: If your mind is clear that this is what it is looking for, and acts with force of purpose, of course it is possible. If when the mind is silenced for a moment thanks to these practices you find yourself, then they are useful. In reality it is not what you use as a means of practice that leads to a correct result, but what your mind knows. You can be practicing, using your own existence as an object, and your mind is thinking about healing, quartz, etc., and never find yourself again.

The mind must know at all times where it is going and, above all, it must sacrifice everything that is useless. You understand?

[I-a: Nods his head.]

We have spent a little time. Let's sink into ourselves.

 

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