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Parameshwar Maharaj
Submerging into Myself
Advaita in Practice
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5. When the perception of "being" disappears
Q: Parameshwar, you have already commented several times that the Atma-Marga consists of only two steps. From the ego to the "I Am" and from this to the Absolute. But I find it very hard to understand how to give the first, and the second is in the plane of utopia, of the ideal. I beg you to tell us about the first step.
P: How not! This is what is really worth talking about. But I ask you, I ask you, to sharpen your attention and, above all, that you do not form concepts about what I say. If you do not understand, ask a thousand times, I will give you brief and structured information.
Individuality has two apparent forms, the first is pure Being Consciousness, that is, the direct perception that "I Am", the attention is turned on itself, and the second, is the first but identified with the physical body, thoughts and feelings and attention completely turned outward, externalized and permanently identified with objects. This is the consciousness that predominates in you.
The process is roughly like this: When an impression hits the Consciousness, the I instantly realizes the impact and the mind automatically qualifies it as pleasant or unpleasant, according to this information, and by force of habit, it is generated an energy reaction (Shakti), biochemistry, such as love, tenderness, sympathy, anger, anger, hatred, etc. This reaction is what we know as feeling or emotion and these in turn provoke thoughts of the same quality. The "I" is immersed and trapped in that energetic vortex that occurs in the physical body and reacts with an action that carries some consequences (Karma, cause and effect). What we are less interested in knowing is how all this happens and what to do to get rid of it.
There are two points to take into account in all this, the first is that the attention is permanently externalized, and this causes the second important point, which is the continuous identification with the environment which forces us to know ourselves as body, thoughts and feelings, in a few words: we do not know ourselves in any other way than this.
To get out of this illusory mess we have invented philosophical systems, faith, techniques, methods (which more complex), but the same problem always prevails, we are identified with the method, and this makes it very difficult to break the illusion of self -ego. Many of you cannot find a solution in your official religion and transmigrate to other places; however, you continue to function in the same way despite being told how to "do". Now, with what little has been said, what do you think about how to break the ego illusion?
Q: Exercise any kind of action on the two points you have mentioned: turn attention inward and disidentify objects.
I-a: This is clear from the teachings you have given us, but it is that I do not "meet" when I turn my attention to myself.
P: The absence of Self-Consciousness, or the sensation or perception of Self, is given by the permanent identification with the objects. I'll give you a simple example. When you read a book, instead of focusing on what you read, focus on the same attention. With this simple exercise you will begin to turn your attention to yourself and begin to understand what it means to be present here and now. If you are able to do this, you will soon perceive yourself as the I that you are. There are many, many exercises created for this purpose. When the focus is on itself, the "I Am" is revealed, and when it appears, the Understanding, the Jnana, emerges.
I-b: I have practiced meditation for a long time and that result has never happened.
P: It's because you've never turned attention to yourself. The attention you have always kept on an object, be it breathing, an image ...
The duality has not been broken, it has always been like "I -> object". With the kind of simple exercise that I have given you, and that can be applied to everything, the dual relationship is "I -> I". With this, what is intended is to break the duality, but the matter does not end there.
The duality is the Witness directing the gaze (attention) on the objects, and it is about always having the perception of being the Witness when the attention is placed on something, whether it is an external or internal object. What is involved is to come to perceive us as the Witness "I Am", this will automatically break with the misconception that "I am me and my circumstances."
Q: They say that Ramana Maharshi's method of self-inquiry is the most direct ...
P: It will be like this when the attention is looking at itself, if this does not happen, every method is unsuccessful. You are the focus of attention. You have to learn to see, hear, taste, feel and smell from "inside". You understand? This is something you have never done, hence the difficulties to know yourself as the pure I that you already are. The problem of ignorance arises because of this inability. The most direct method is to realize that you are alive and follow the trace of existence that emanates from the "I Am." Being is Existence and through it you may perceive yourself. The most difficult step is the awareness that you are the Self, the absorption of the "I Am" in the Absolute comes by itself, in silence. The second step is relatively easy, it only requires the realization of the Self, which is nothing more than making the perception of oneself permanent. This, by silencing the mind, transcends the egoic characteristics (vasanas); However, until it becomes permanent it requires constant practice, that is, never falling or almost never into oblivion. Oblivion is the loss of the awareness of ME. When this happens, the mind always takes the place of the King, reinforcing the egoic consciousness. Once the ego has been transcended, it is the turn of the Self. One realizes that the self is maintained by "looking at itself", this is duality, and it is understood that to be does not need any permanent look, which is already without the need to be conscious. It is a very natural act and it does not require effort, you loose moorings, the final abandonment arrives. The notion completely of I is lost, it is Nirvana, the extinction of the Self.
Q: Is not this forgetting about Being, going back to unconsciousness?
P: Not at all. He is never absent, there is what has always been there, in the background of everything. It is the container of Everything and nothing happens outside of It.
Q: It's like music, silence is the background of a piece, it arises and disappears in it.
P: It's a good simile, yes. An apparent birth arises and an apparent death happens while It is absent from all this illusory movement, as also the Being, the Self, appears and disappears.
Q: Earlier you said that forgetfulness is the absence of I consciousness, and I think that, in addition, of the Absolute too.
P: You approach the Absolute from the point of view of an individuality. This has nothing to do with Existence, it is not even aware of itself, if it were, it would be the "I Am". No one can experience that, therefore it can not be forgotten; everything takes apparent reality when the Individuality appears, which is the sense of Being, of existence. In the "I Am", all this occupies a foreground, while in the ego it is taken for granted, remaining in the background. The ego does not realize its existence, it assumes that being alive is physically moving, thinking, feeling, experiencing in life, etc. The Being is the Pure Existence, and this is precisely the core of the illusion, the Absolute has nothing to do with existence.
Q: This is still a bit terrible. It is hard to realize that the final result of the search is "non-existence."
P: Yes? Well, take it or leave it. [Laughs.] However, for you it is still a concept. You can not enjoy the sacred stillness that can be experienced only in the Self, this stillness or beatitude is called Ananda. This beatific state is complete disidentification of everything, and that means even of existence. That which seems so terrible to you, in a state of bliss is a blessing. If you had felt for a second the peace of the Self you would look like crazy to repeat the moment. The Absolute is beyond all this game that only occurs when there is Individuality, there are no fears or beatitudes some because there is no such thing as "I", the Experient, the Witness.
Q: I see what you say. Everything revolves around the sense of existence. The value we give or not to life depends only on the sense of being.
P: That value is more mental than visceral. All your life is a concept that you defend by cape and sword; the sense of being does not have it, perhaps only when reference is made to it, which is good, but you forget it when your attention is abducted by another matter. The Illusion is very powerful, so much that it enhances your forgetfulness.
Q: Oblivion implies a memory, is it perhaps the memory of something we have lived?
P: That memory has two faces, the memory of a lost state that you recover every time you are. That state was your natural state before your personality developed, I am talking about your three, four, five years ... The forgetfulness is so frequent that years and years can pass between two moments of presence, and that also, through ignorance , you do not value them. The "taste of being" is very old, so much that it is not valued or taken into account, this being precisely what gives way to the Last State. When the Being is extinguished what is left is the Absolute.