4. Someone is rediscovered

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Q: Parameshwar! Speaking of self-perception or the sensation of being ... last week I had an experience that really impressed me a lot. In meditation, since I came here, I have tried to put your teachings into practice, look inwards and find myself as the observer of everything else, as consciousness, as the subject who sees, who hears all things. I try to be aware of my body in contact with the chair where I meditate to see that I am not my body. I have been doing this practice for a while.

But the other day something happened to me spontaneously and outside of meditation. Suddenly I saw my face in a mirror, and suddenly I felt the same inner sensation as when I was about six or seven years old. I thought that if at seven years of age he had seen me in the future as I am now, he would not have recognized me, because at the moment I am not physically the same at all. If I had projected then with my imagination, in the image obtained would be much prettier than I am now. Surely.

And yet, even though I did not recognize myself as the same person with respect to the physical, I had never felt so myself, because I am consciousness that examines an objective body. That is, my body was something external to me, it was something objective, I examined my physical features as I could have examined that chair or the table or any person that was not me. And at the same time I had the sensation of being me, the only me that can observe the outside. The same one that was when I was seven years old and that has accompanied me all my life until now.

It is difficult for me to explain, but I realized that this inner being that I am, that inner consciousness, is what I am, what I have always been and what I will always be until I die, even if I die with a hundred years ; I will always be the same. My body will continue to change, but I will always be equal to myself, I will never be able to say "I" and feel myself to be someone else.

It was very shocking to me and I was in a state of inner silence in a natural way. There were no thoughts in my head. My mind stopped and the objects of the house or the street seemed more bright, alive. Even the shadows of the objects or the trees had brightness.

Unfortunately, that state lasted me two days and it happened to me. Again the mental rattle has appeared.

Can you explain to me why this state has disappeared and what should I do now?

Thank you.

P: Well, what else do you want to know, what do you need more? It has disappeared? Get it back, you already know what to do!

What you want is to return to that state, but you are looking towards the wrong place. It is not about the phenomenology that surrounds the sudden change of consciousness, the luminous colors, the echoed sounds, etc. The only thing that matters is the awareness, that you have realized the "I Am" is you, that you are the same as "always" and that, even though the body changes, you still perceive yourself just as when You were a girl That's the only thing that counts!

What do you have to do? Be! I know and you will see how thoughts stop flowing and much more. This is your sadhana now, staying with ME at all times, and if you lose your presence, return quietly in you. The Knowledge that you have acquired is due to the awareness of a lived reality, because you are the Intelligence that inhabits this body, as your own presence is maintained the eyes of Knowledge will be opened, but that will come only .

And as for why it has disappeared ... it is because this is not your natural state; however, all experience points to a higher level of yourself and that is common to all, accessible through the effort necessary to transcend the current level. We are talking about ignorance, and its dissipation always implies a change of thinking and feeling as a human being. The Intelligence that you are, when you become aware of the state of Being, automatically realizes that the "normal" state is not adequate.

 

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