A really free consciousness will not be sensual but will be sensitive —
deeply sensitive and sensuous. Really, when a Buddha sees a flower, he sees the flower in its totality, in its total beauty, in its total aliveness. The colour, the fragrance, everything, Buddha sees in its totality. He will never think again about this flower — he will never be sensual. He will not hanker again to see it more and more, repeatedly. He will never think again about this flower — not because he is not sensuous, but because he is totally sensuous, and he has lived this experience so deeply that there is no need to repeat.
The need to repeat comes because you cannot live any moment totally — so you eat, and again you have to think to repeat it. You love, and you have to think to repeat it. You are less concerned with living than you are concerned with repetition. This repetitive hankering is sensuality.
One part is biological, hereditary; another is sociological.
There is sex: become aware that the unconscious instinct is forcing your body mechanism towards a particular object, towards a particular act. But don't fight it because that fight is again, from the sociological part of the unconscious which says that sex is sin. Be aware of both, be conscious of both: there is sex, and there is the concept that sex is sin. Both are coming from some place you don't know, from a deep darkness within.
Be conscious — don't do anything! Just remain conscious. Try to be in an alert state. Don't fight with the sex, don't condemn it — don't go to indulge in it. Simply remain conscious of the fact that something is happening inside. If you can remain conscious of the fact that something is happening inside, if you can remain with the fact without dong anything, you will feel that your consciousness is growing and penetrating the dark realm of the unconscious.
If you are alert, two things happen:
The energy that was going to be used as indulgence or as suppression will become part of your alertness. Your alertness will be strengthened through that energy. That energy will move to your alertness; you will become more alert. That energy will become a fuel to your consciousness.
You will be more conscious, and for the first time the unconscious will not be able to force you. For the first time unconsciousness will be incapable of manipulating you. And once you know the feeling of this freedom, that the unconscious cannot manipulate you — without any fight, without any struggle, without any conflict — then your consciousness has become stronger.
And, by and by, the field of consciousness will grow and the field of unconsciousness will shrink. Your human iceberg will have gained one part more: you will be two parts conscious, eight parts unconscious. This is a long journey, and by and by you will become three parts conscious, seven parts unconscious. As you gain more it is just like reclaiming land from the ocean.
The unconscious is a vast ocean; you have to reclaim land inch by inch. But the moment you reclaim land, the ocean shrinks back. A day comes, just like it came to a Buddha or to a Jesus, when you are conscious all the ten parts and the unconscious has disappeared. You are just light inside and no darkness. This is the flowering.
And for the first time you become aware of your immortality. For the first time you are now not a seed. For the first time for you there is no becoming — you have become a being. If this expression can be allowed: You have become a being!
In this enlightened state of being, there is no suffering, no conflict, no misery. You are filled with bliss. Inside you are bliss, outside you are compassion. You have become sensitive to everything.
Because of that sensitivity, a Buddha is compassion outside; inside, a deep silent pool of bliss, and outside a compassion. Buddha's lips are smiling with a deep bliss, and his eyes are filled with tears — in a deep compassion. That's why you can work both ways. If you grow in consciousness, you will grow in compassion; if you grow in compassion, you will grow in consciousness. But to grow in compassion is very difficult — because you can again deceive.
[2. Ref Osho's "The Ultimage Alchemy", vol. 1.]
So the only right path is to grow in consciousness, then compassion comes as a shadow. Otherwise you can deceive and your compassion can just be a facade, a deception. Your compassion can again be an unconscious act. Then it is sentimental, emotional — not existential. Then you can weep, you can sympathize and you can serve. But this is going to be again an unconscious thing. The surest and most certain path is to grow in consciousness.
You might have heard that the seventh chakra in yoga is sahasrardal kamal —
the one-thousand-petalled lotus on the seventh chakra in your head. That seventh chakra is the last stage, the peak, the Everest of consciousness.
The first chakra is muladhar — the sex center, and the last chakra is sahasrar. Sex is the most unconscious thing in you, and the sahasrar is the most conscious. These are the two poles.
We live around the sex center, move around it. Whatsoever we do is related with sex, howsoever distant it may look. Your earning money, your accumulating wealth, may not look at all related with sex, but they are related. The more wealth you have, the more sex you can have; it becomes more possible. The more power you have, the more sex you can have; it becomes more possible.
You may forget completely, and ends may become means and means may become ends; that's another thing. One person can go on accumulating wealth for his whole life, and he may completely forget for what he is doing it. But every power search is for sex.
We move around the center of sex, we are bound to because unless we grow in consciousness we cannot go beyond it. That is the most unconscious-rooted center, the lowest, and for that reason the deepest and the most unconscious. The higher you move in consciousness, the further you go from sex. And then there is a flowering of a different type. The whole energy moves to the seventh — sahasrar. And when the whole energy comes to the seventh chakra, it becomes a flower — one-thousand-petalled. This is a beautiful imagery. It means with unlimited, infinite petals, the flower opens.
The unconscious can be transformed only through awareness.
It is difficult, but there is no other way. There are many methods for being aware, but awareness is necessary. There are many ways to create light — but light will have to be created. You can create a fire and there will be no darkness. And you can use a kerosene lamp and there will be no darkness, and you can use electricity and there will be no darkness. But whatsoever the case, whatsoever the method of producing light, light has to be produced.
So light is a must, and whatsoever I will say in reference to this question will be about methods to produce awareness. Remember, they are not alternatives to awareness — nothing can be. Awareness is the only possibility for dispelling darkness, for dispelling unconsciousness.
But how to create awareness?
I talked about one method which is the purest: to be aware inside of whatsoever happens on the boundary line of the unconscious and to the conscious — to be aware there. Anger is there. Anger is produced in darkness; anger has roots in the unconscious.
Only branches and leaves come into the conscious. Roots, seeds, the energy source, are in the unconscious. You become aware only of faraway branches. Be conscious of these branches. The more conscious you are, the more you will be capable of looking into darkness. Inner darkness, unconsciousness, is the same. Look into it.
But you can look only if you are not active. If you begin to act, your mind is distracted. Don't act inside. Anger is there — don't act, don't condemn, don't appreciate, don't indulge in it, and don't suppress it. Don't do anything — just look at it! observe it! Understand the distinction.
What happens ordinarily is quite the reverse. If you are angry, then your mind is focused on the cause of anger outside — always! Someone has insulted you — you are angry. Then there are three things: the cause of anger outside, the source of anger inside, and in between these two you are. Anger is your energy inside, the cause which has provoked your energy to come up is outside, and you are in between.
The natural way of the mind is not to be aware of the source, but to be focused on the cause outside. Whenever you are angry you are in deep concentration on the cause outside. Mahavir  has called Kroudha (anger) a sort of meditation. He has named it Roudra Dhyan: meditation on negative attitudes. It is! — because you are concentrated. Really, when you are in deep anger you are so concentrated that the whole world disappears. Only the cause of anger is focused.
Your total energy is on the cause of anger, and you are so much focused on the cause that you forget yourself completely. That's why in anger you can do things about which, later on, you can say, "I did them in spite of myself."
For awareness you have to take an about-turn. You have to concentrate not on the cause outside, but on the source inside. Forget the cause. Close your eyes, and go deep and dig into the source. Then you can use the same energy which was to be wasted on someone outside — the energy moves inwards. Anger has much energy. Anger is energy — the purest of fires inside. don't waste it outside.
Take another example. You are feeling sexual: sex is again energy, fire. But whenever you feel sexual, again you are focused on someone outside, not on the source. you begin to think of someone — of the lover, of the beloved, A-B-C-D — but when you are filled with sex your focus is always on the other. You are dissipating energy.
Not only in the sexual act do you dissipate energy, but in sexual thinking you dissipate it even more because a sexual act is a momentary thing. It comes to a peak, the energy is released, and you are thrown back. But sexual thinking can continuously be there. You can continue it in sexual thinking, you can dissipate energy.
And everyone is dissipating energy. Ninety percent of our thinking is sexual. Whatsoever you are doing outside, inside sex is a constant concern — you may not even be aware of it. You are sitting in a room and a woman enters: your posture changes suddenly. Your spine is more erect, your breathing changes, your blood pressure is different. You may not be aware at all of what has happened, but your whole body has reacted sexually.
You were a different person when the woman was not there; now again you are a different person. An all-male group is a different group, and all-female group is a different group. Let one male come in or one female, and the whole group, the whole energy pattern, changes suddenly.
You may not be conscious of it, but when your mind is focused on someone, your energy begins to flow. When you feel sexual, look at the source, not at the cause — remember this. Science is more concerned with the cause and religion is more concerned with the source. The source is always inside; the cause is always outside. With cause you are in a chain reaction. With cause you are connected with your environment. With source you are connected with yourself.
This is the purest method to change unconscious energy into conscious energy: Take an about-turn — look inside! It is going to be difficult because our look has become fixed. We are like a person whose neck is paralyzed, and who cannot move and look back. Our eyes have become fixed. We have been looking outside for lives together — for millennia — so we don't know how to look inside.
Do this: whenever something happens in your mind, follow it to the source. Anger is there — a sudden flash has come to you — close your eyes, meditate on it. From where is this anger arising? Never ask the question: who has made it possible? who has made you angry? That is a wrong question. Ask which energy in you is transforming into anger — from where is this anger coming up, bubbling up, what is the source inside from where this energy is coming?
Be concerned with from where anger is bubbling up, from where the sex desire has come in. Follow it, take steps backwards. Meditate silently and go with anger to the roots. It is difficult but it is not impossible. It is not easy. It is not going to be easy because it is a fight against a long-rooted habit.
The whole past has to be broken, and you have to do something new which you have never done before. It is just the weight of sheer habit which will create the difficulty. But try it, and then you are creating a new direction for energy to move. You are beginning to be a circle, and in a circle energy is never dissipated. The energy comes up and moves outside — it can never become a circle then; it is simply dissipated.
If my movement inwards is there, then the same energy which was going out turns upon itself. My meditation leads this energy back to the same source from where the anger was coming. It becomes a circle. This inner circle is the strength of a Mahavir. The sex energy, not moving to someone else, moves back to its own source. This circle of sex energy is the strength of a Buddha.
The science of japa says,
that when you become a hearer of your own sound, then you have reached. Then you have completed the japa. And there is much in it. When you hear a sound, for example, "Ram", your peripheral apparatus is used in creating it, your vocal apparatus. Or it you create a mental sound, then your mind is used to create it. But when you become alert about it, that alertness is of the center, not of the periphery. If I say "Ram", this is on the periphery of my being. When I listen to this sound "Ram" inside, that is from my center — because awareness belongs to the center. If you become aware in the center, now you have the light with you. you can dispel unconsciousness.
The basic natural possibility of muladhar chakra is the sex urge of the physical body.
The very first question that arises in the mind of the seeker is what to do in regard to this central principle. Now there is another possibility of this chakra, and that is brahmacharya, celibacy, which is attainable through meditation. Sex is the natural possibility, and brahmacharya is its transformation. The more the mind is focused upon and gripped by sexual desire, the more difficult it will be to reach its ultimate potential of brahmacharya.
This means that we can utilize the situation given to us by nature in two ways:
We can live in the condition that nature has placed us in — but then the process of spiritual growth cannot begin — or we transform this state.
The only danger in the path of transformation is that there is the possibility that we may begin to fight with our natural center.
What is the real danger in the path of a seeker? The first obstacle is that if the meditator indulges only in nature's order of things he cannot rise to the ultimate possibility of his physical body and he stagnates at the starting point. On the one hand there is a need; on the other hand there is a suppression which causes the meditator to fight the sex urge. Suppression is an obstacle on the path of meditation. This is the obstacle of the first chakra. Transformation cannot come about with suppression.
If suppression is an obstruction, what is the solution? Understanding will then solve the matter. Transformation takes place within as you begin to understand sex. There is a reason for this. All elements of nature lie blind and unconscious within us. If we become conscious of them, transformation begins.
Awareness is the alchemy; awareness is the alchemy of changing them, of transforming them. If a person becomes awake toward his sexual desires with his total feelings and his total understanding, then brahmacharya will begin to take birth within him in place of sex. Unless a person reaches brahmacharya in his first body it is difficult to work on the potentiality of other centers.
If you run away from sex in fright how will you ever reach brahmacharya?
Sex was the opening given by nature, and brahmacharya is the quest that has to be undertaken through this very opening. If you see in this perspective there is no need to beg from anywhere; understanding is what is required. All of existence is there for the purpose of understanding. Learn from anybody, hear everyone, and, finally, understand your own self within.
Sex serves no greater purpose than a sneeze.
A tension is thrown out, a load is unburdened. When the energy is thrown out a load is unburdened. When the energy is thrown out you feel dissipated. To relax is one thing, to feel dissipated is quite another. Relaxation means the energy is within and you are resting, and to feel dissipated means energy is thrown out and you lie exhausted. You are weakened with the loss of energy and you think you are relaxing.
I say again and again that sex is the basic duality,
and unless you transcend sex the Brahman cannot be achieved. All other dualities are just reflections and reflections of this basic duality. Birth and death, again a duality. They will disappear when you are neither male or female. When you have a consciousness which goes beyond both — then birth and death disappear, matter and mind disappear, this world and that world disappear, heaven and hell disappear. All dualities disappear when the basic duality within you disappears, because all dualities are simply echoing and re-echoing the basic division within you.
If you allow your unconscious to come nearer to your conscious,
then much sex-obsession will disappear. If you are a man and you deny your unconscious, you are denying your inner woman; then you will be attracted to outer women too much. It will become a perversion because then it is a substitute. The inner femininity has been denied; now the outer femininity becomes obsessive to you. You will think and think about it; now your whole mind will become sexual. If you are a woman and you have denied the man, then "man" will take possession of you. Then whatsoever you do or think, the basic color will remain sexual.
So much fantasy about sex is because you have denied your inner other.
So now this is a compensation. Now you are compensating for something which you have denied to yourself. And look at the absurdity: the more you get obsessed with the other sex the more you feel afraid; the more you deny the inner the more you suppress it; and the more you suppress it the more you become obsessed.
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